Thursday, March 29, 2012

Simply Live

~ lambie, lambie, lambie ~
After pouring my guts heart out in the last post, I feel ever so much better, although, I think it has more to do with your kind comments than the emptying of my soul. In my case, soul emptying isn't so much courage as the fear of standing before God, hopefully in the far future, and having Him say, "I gave you such a Large Life, why did you choose to live small?" shudder! 
In this "grief journey", I've learned it's best to just go with it when it happens. There's no stemming the flow of grief but I do try to stay on the farm, behind locked gates, when grief overwhelms me. If I'm in public, I head for the nearest restroom or back to the car; there's no need in causing others discomfort and, if there's one thing I've learned, folks who can handle a crying woman are few and far between. When I've encountered someone in distress, if it's someone I know, I give them a hug and ask if I may pray for them. If they say "yes", I start praying; if it's someone I don't know, perhaps I'll touch them on the arm or shoulder and ask the same question. As the old saying goes, there are no atheists in a foxhole and no one has ever turned down my offer of prayer.
Each week brings new opportunities to work as well as the same ole grind. Of course, my same ole grind is beautiful to me...lambs, calves, kittens, spring...and, once again, the cycle of grieving has taken an upturn. In other words, grief will be "manageable" for a day or three or God knows how long, before I'm swamped again. It's a roller coaster ride sans seat belt and all I can do is hang on and try to keep up but knowing God's plans are for me to prosper and do well, to give me hope and a future while I cast my cares upon Him because He cares for me. With Him carrying me and the load, I can do this grief journey! sort of.
"That it will never come again is what makes life so sweet."
~ Emily Dickinson ~
Ashley, a neighbor, works at her SIL's vet clinic and is forever bringing home the waifs that are abandoned or need special TLC. Like the lamb above; he was attacked by a dog and sustained severe injuries all over his body. There are those who say if you look cross-eyed at a sheep, it will fall over dead. This lil' feller says naaaaaay! He's still alive, doing well, drinking a bottle and wearing diapers because he's living in the house. I told John, Ashley's husband, "I could never work at a vet clinic; it's a license to starve." Meaning, of course, I'd bring home Everyone who needed a home. How on earth do you think Dave and I ended up with 5...sometimes 6 when Jake comes to eat...dogs, 3 house cats, barn cats, rescued sheep and horses? 
~ Flash and Lambie ~
Flash, John's "basket hound", is long suffering as Lambie nuzzles in the, unrealized, hope of finding a working teat. 
~ is this the look of guilt? ~
One of the dog beds is a feather mattress...hard to believe, eh? I bought it at a thrift store, not knowing it was a feather mattress but, as you can see, now I know. It needs a sheet, sewn into a U shape, so I can stuff the mattress in there, fold the end under and stop vacuuming feathers every week. It looks like someone has killed chickens in my office! 
~ Daniel, Morgan and my sheep ~
Last week was sheep de-worming and we're going to shear in April. The farm isn't open to the public any longer, I can only do so much and something had to give. Friends have asked if they can come help; well, gosh, gee, if you're sure....HA! free labor...gotta love it! I'll fix a wonderful homemade lunch - bread, soup, dessert, iced tea, coffee - and we'll make it a fun day. My little flock is only 28 so it won't take Clinton but three hours or less and that's if he takes his time. I wanted to shear this weekend but Clinton is knee deep in lambing and can't take time away from his own flock. In the next few days, I'll try and get to his farm to take some photos.
Our Cove Volunteer Fire Department is active and we're up to 18 members...hurrah! I won't fight fires but I'll bake cookies for every meeting and take notes, keep records, etc. Basically, whatever makes our fire fighter's lives easier, I'm there to do willingly. We're a very small community but spread out over thousands and thousands and thousands...you get the idea...of acres. In our valley there are about thirty people but we go to the surrounding valley's when we're called upon to help. None of us are paid, we do this because we want to help ourselves and each other; we live the way our Grandparent's lived and the way we're admonished...treat others the way you'd want them to treat you.
That's not to say we don't argue, fuss and fight at times but we always manage to kiss, figuratively, and make up. We have to; we're dependent upon each other and look out for each other's homes, livestock, fences, each other. 
~ double rainbow ~
Throughout the years, we've seen several double rainbows off our back porch. Did you know before Noah's ark and the 40 day and night rain, there'd been no rain upon the earth? Only dew and after the flood subsided, God gave Noah a a promise or covenant that said He, God, would set a (rain)bow in the sky to let it be know He, God, would never again destroy the earth by water. The Bible is full of God's promises and, lest I forget, I'm forever reminding God of His promises. It helps me no matter what emotions are racking my brain and body and it's the only way I can live. With God's help, I simply live, each and ever day. Bless His name forever.

Blessings ~ promises, especially God's promises ~ lambs ~ good help ~ home made food ~ neighbors ~ a hope and a future ~ rainbows ~ 

28 comments:

Vicki W said...

" I've learned it's best to just go with it when it happens"
Isn't that true about almost everything in life? I think it's such a blessing to live in a rural area and to really experience the changing of the seasons. It seems to make everything else make some sense.

La Petite Gallery said...

I have to tell you that my Dal-Dog saved my life during Cancer and the loss of my Husband. It was last june 8 that I had to put him down and I still can feek him last night I can almost see those blue eyes. Every thing takes time.
Just go eith the flow. yvonne
.

La Petite Gallery said...

I have to tell you that my Dal-Dog saved my life during Cancer and the loss of my Husband. It was last june 8 that I had to put him down and I still can feek him last night I can almost see those blue eyes. Every thing takes time.
Just go eith the flow. yvonne
.

Splenderosa said...

Oh that little lamb, and you guys are wonderful for nursing him back to good health. Bless the beasts...

Maple Lane said...

What a precious and enjoyable post, Sandra. That little lamb is adorable. God works in mysterious ways....on the 1st anniversary of mama's passing, little kitten Magic showed up meowing at our door. I'm with you, I could NEVER work at a vet's office! Sending my love and prayers to you.
you might enjoy a sweet story of friendship and God's goodness on my blog this a.m.

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

A beautiful post. Poor little lamb - you are kind to take him in.

I had to LOL over the feather bed!

Nancy said...

What a heartfelt post....You sure were sweet to take him in....

Thanks for the suggestions you left on my blog...Good advice....

Ginny said...

You have such a lovely blog, and the title really attracted me. I am so sorry to hear about your husband, I did get caught up in reading your post from below. I have dealt with so much cancer, but not myself. My husband, mother, best friend, and brother-in-law, I could go on... People need to stop judging Patrick Swayze's wife, they don't walk in her shoes, yet they stand from afar and judge.

Lynne said...

Flash and Lambie look almost like twins . . . great post!

Lady Farmer said...

Oh, Sandra~ you are such a dear, asking others if you can pray for them! I suspect your crown is going to be mighty heavy by the time you reach heaven! ;~P
What a sweet little lambie ~ wearing a diaper, no less! Precious! I'm with the other gals ~ I'd bring home every animal I could get my hands on if I worked at a vets office! (I've had that opportunity and turned it down just for that very reason!)
How histerical is that photo of your doggy's feather bed!!! I love it! I think the pooch looks quite satisfied with his nights work!
Only 28 sheep! Sounds like a lot to me! I didn't know they had to be de-wormed every year. Just like horses, I guess. I hope you show a little of the process of washing the wool and preparing it for spinning. I would love to have a few (2) sheep and try my hand at spinning. (I did wash a fleece and carded it and made rologs (sp?) and spun some very crude yarn once on my daughter's new spinning wheel. She has never used it ~ too busy with babies of her own.)
You are such a busy gal ~now helping with the fire dept.! There's another jewel in that crown!
Praying your day is filled with rainbows and kept promises!

edenhills said...

It would be very difficult to work in a vet's office and not adopt every hard luck case. Glad your little lamb is doing well.

Star said...

Dear lamb, dogs and all! Lamb looks so cute in that nappy! Well done you for taking him in. He looks like he wants to survive, like the little pup I keep reading about lately.

Kathy ~ Cackles and Berries said...

Lambie is so stinken cute! Won't be long till my girls start lambing. I love this time of year. Everywhere i look on the farm I'm reminded of God's infinate wisdom and how he cares for his creations. Enjoy the good days when you can, and continue to lean on him when they aren't so good. **hugs** for you Sandra and my prayers continue.

LindaSue said...

OK you had me with the diaper wearing half shaved lamb - you are a hoot! Life is richer for knowing you !

Michelle said...

A lovely, positive post. Hugs to you on good days, and BEAR hugs on the bad ones!

Nancy Claeys said...

Somehow, it all works out... so happy the little lamb is surviving and finding new friends.

Have a relaxing evening, Sandra. :)

Patrice said...

You have such a sweet heart for taking in that little lamb.He looks so funny in diapers. I think he needs a little t-shirt to finish off the outfit. :) I think it's great that you help support the local fire department. We have a very strong volunteer system for fire and EMS in our area.

I believe that you are a very special person, offering to pray for others when you have been through so much. Blessings!

KathyB. said...

Love the picture of your feathered dog! Those feathers are so hard to vacuum, aren't they? ( been there, done that!)

Life just keeps coming at us, doesn't it? I am so grateful God keeps reminding me He is in control, no matter how I feel.Prayers for you Sandra.

I love the way your community does what is necessary, by volunteering. We have a small fire dept. similar to yours in our little district, but also have the bigger county fire depts. as back-up when necessary.

IMGIRL said...

Good morning friend!

I just love looking out my window into your blog!

Big peaceful sigh....

Back to work now!

Have a blessed day!

IMGIRL said...

Sandra,
My peaceful sigh did not last very long. Difficult day. I always come back to your blog where I know I can gather up some inspiration. My husband has been ill for 12 years now and after the first two, I never dreamed it would be this hard. If it were not for God's grace and promises, I don't know how I would manage from day to day and I am not the one who is sick.
I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you can feel the hug I send your way for a day when you need it most. You have helped me through some rough days and you didn't even know it. GOD places jewels in our path to give us hope and light the way. You have been a jewel for me.
I hope you have a beautiful day today. I thank God for all the angels that hold my hand in the dark. I know you must be one of them.

Blessing to you ~
Kim

Val said...

"Now I know" about the feather bed made me laugh. :) I'm glad you are surounded by so much beauty, at any time but especially while wrestling with so much of the "Heavy." And crying women don't scare me, in-person or on-paper, :) so write on, Sandra. and get it out. ♥

That's great about helping the fire department and community. You spread so much good.

Hugs,

Val

vicki said...

Sandra- what a beautiful post. It's wonderful to see the welcome signs of spring on your farm. What a sweet little lamb- I'm glad he will survive. Like you, I'd want to bring home every stray animal.

That beautiful rainbow- and God's promise. I know your heart still hurts- sometimes worse than others. In so many ways- I hope the birth of spring brings you some better days and a lighter heart.
Vicki

Lady Farmer said...

Hi Sandra~
Just wanted to let you know about my Friday Funnies. The back of the truck says Dunkin Donuts. :~P

YOu don't need to publish this, but wanted you to know what it said.
Hope you are having a good day.

Celestina Marie said...

Hi Sandra, What a little darling you are giving a home, to heal and grow. This post and the one before are so heartfelt. I understand so well. Love seeing the rainbow and the comfort of God's promises.
Thank you for sharing and thank you for stopping by and your kind comment.
Wishing you a nice weekend and sending hugs, heart to heart!
Blessings, Celestina Marie

Madge Bloom said...

I got a kick out of the shot of your pup, the feather bed and the looks of 'killed chickens' in your office... lol!

Sandra said...

i read last weeks post and this post and it seems to me you have a good handle on your grief and are doing every thing you can and should. there is no advice to give because each person grieves in a different way. I pray your grief will get less and less each day and that your good memories will stay with you. i love all your photos and would love to live on a farm like yours.

Karen said...

I've been away from blogging for a good while, but your words still ring with deep truths and wise admonitions...and the diapered lamb and feathered office gave me smiles...thanks for having such a sharing heart!

GLENDA CHILDERS said...

Three cheers for some days with a bit of relief from the intense grieving. And having fun on your beautiful farm.

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