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I am Sandra - faithful steward. listener. shepherd. dream believer. hard worker. collects brass bells, boots. Jesus follower. contented. star gazer. homemaker. farmer. prayer warrior. country woman. reader. traveler. writer. homebody. living life large.

Friday, March 23, 2012

Phrase Wisdom

~ laughter is good medicine ~
"Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, "Lillian, you should have remained a virgin..."
~ Lillian Carter, Mother of Jimmy Carter ~

"I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: "no good in bed, but fine against a wall." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

"Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement." ~ Mark Twain ~

"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible." ~ George Burns ~

"Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit people only once a year." ~ Victor Borge ~

"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint." ~ Mark Twain ~

"I'm more concerned about the return of my money than the return on my money." ~ Will Rogers ~

"By all means, marry. If you get a good wife [husband], you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ~ Socrates ~

"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."  ~ Groucho Marx ~

"My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breath."
~ Jimmy Durante ~

"I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back."
~ Zsa Zsa Gabor ~

"Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat."
~ Alex Levine ~

"My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying." ~ Rodney Dangerfield ~

"Money can't buy you happiness...But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery."
~ Spike Milligan ~

"I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap." ~ Bob Hope ~

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it." ~ W. C. Fields ~

"We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress."
~ Will Rogers ~

"Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you." ~ Winston Churchill ~

"Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty... But everything else starts to wear out, fall out or spread out."
~ Phyllis Diller ~

"By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere."  ~ Billy Crystal ~

"The only easy day was yesterday." 
~ Richard R. Deyo ~ 
Blessings ~ laughter ~ humor ~ wise words ~ 

19 comments:

  1. Love this to start my miserable day with a good laugh.

    Hope all is going well foryou sweet friend.
    TTFN ~
    Hugs,
    Marydon

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  2. Good ones!!! The Miss Lillian one has always been one of my favorites....she was certainly a doodle!

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  3. I laughed so hard at the first one that I could barely read the others! Thanks for the morning laugh.

    I hope all is well.

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  4. Thanks for the smiles Sandra . . . I enjoyed each/all and especially this Will Rogers . . .

    "We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress."

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  5. Thank you for making me smile today!

    Here's one I've remembered (perhaps not word-for-word, but close, I think) since High School:
    "Can anyone remember when times were not hard and money was not scarce?"
    Ralph Waldo Emerson

    It helped frame my lifeview for the next 40-odd years. (Add you know...some of them have been quite odd!)

    Have a lovely day :)

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  6. Your phrases made me smile :o)))!
    Thank you!!!

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  7. Thanks for the smiles this rainy Spring day, Sandra.

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  8. Too funny Sandra! Eleanor Roosevelt has always been a favorite of mine.

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  9. Those are great!They go right along with my Friday Funnies on my blog! (Your's are 'funnier' than mine!)
    Hope you are finding it a bit easier to smile some each day. I'm still praying!

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  10. Hi. Enjoyed this post!!!

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  11. Thanks for the smiles! I do have a comeback on the money not buying happiness, though. "Those who say you can't buy happiness have never bought a puppy."

    :-)

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  12. Just the thing first up in the morning Sandra! Have just read the list out to my husband, and we thank you for a giggle to start our day. Esp given that we have to vote today!! Ugghh! x

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  13. Big grin! My first all day!
    Thanks for that.
    Hugs,
    Courtney

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  14. So love this post . . .

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  15. Laughter is good medicine, for sure. Thanks, Sandra.

    Fondly,
    Glenda

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  16. Cute! Love that one by Jimmy Durante. :)

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  17. Hello Sandra:
    These are all such fun, we have been amused greatly by them. Shades of the sharp humoured Sandra of old here...the one we have come to know and love!

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  18. Laughter doeth good like medicine!

    Thanks for the laughter.

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  19. Wonderful compendium. Thanks a lot!!

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